I usually tease Nigerian ladies for wanting Disney movie relationships. I keep reminding them that this is Nigeria and in this part of the world stuff like that don’t happen. Even our pizza doesn’t taste like pizza, it tastes like bread with old cheese and soft meat.
Below are some expectations ladies have that aren’t unrealistic versus what they actually get most times. I’d complain and rant about the new millennial dating but as a guy it favours me more (ps: Yoruba..not demon)
EXPECTATION: He’ll actually say the words: “Will you be my girlfriend?” After that, it won’t take long for him to introduce you to his best friends, his parents, and his grandparents. He’ll even be the first one to say, “I love you.”
REALITY: He never labels the relationship. You have no idea if you’re his FWB or his serious girlfriend. You’re way too embarrassed to ask, so you try to play detective and figure it out on your own. Of course, you end up reading all of his signs wrong and breaking your own heart.
EXPECTATION: Your first kiss with him will be magical, like something you’d see in a Disney movie. You’ll feel fireworks, a flutter in your stomach, and every other cliche in the book.
REALITY: He presses your piano while you’re watching Zee world on his couch. He ends up kissing your neck and tearing off your shirt before he even presses his lips against yours for the first time.
EXPECTATION: After the relationship runs its course, you’ll mutually decide to part ways. It won’t be a heartbreaking experience, like most breakups are. You’ll agree to stay friends, and you’ll actually follow through on the promise to keep in touch.
REALITY: He cheats on you with another girl, one that you’ve always trusted. He doesn’t apologize for screwing you over. He doesn’t even understand why you’re so angry with him. He actually tries to turn the situation around and blame you for the breakup
EXPECTATION: The se xual tension between you and the guy you’ve been seeing will be so strong that you’ll actually be the one to initiate sex. When it happens, he’ll look you in the eyes, whisper about how beautiful you are, and give you multiple orgasms.
REALITY: He doesn’t make you orgasm. In fact, he doesn’t even try. Then, once the sex is over, he leaves without cuddling or ever calling again.
EXPECTATION: The cute guy you’ve spent hours flirting with on Twitter will decide to take your relationship to the next level and meet you in person. Even though it’s normally a hookup site, you’ll end up falling head over heels for each other and will have a cute little story about how you first met.
REALITY: The hot guy you thought you had a connection with ends up dropping all contact with you. He doesn’t tell you why. He just stops answering your messages, so you have to move on to the next guy who’s bound to do the same exact thing.
Credits: FAMAKIN OPEYEMI